El inicio del fin
Definitivamente no es fácil terminar una relación, es un periodo en el que nos enfrentaremos a muchas dudas y miedos, si estás por terminar una relación es por que ya llevas tiempo pensándolo y hace rato que no estás feliz en la relación.
El objetivo de este texto es compartirte información que te ayude a tomar la decisión, discernir si todavía hay amor o se ha convertido en una costumbre, y si has elegido terminar que lo hagas de la mejor forma para ambos.
No vamos a hablar de si hay razones válidas o no para terminar una relación, cada quien sabe hasta que punto esta dispuestx a llegar y si sientes que es momento de cambiar de página es totalmente válido.
Al querer terminar una relación nos sentimos mal de alguna manera, es normal después de haber compartido una parte de la vida con la pareja.
Pero es importante mencionar que no estamos haciendo nada «malo», no hay cabida para la culpa o para atormentarnos por haber decidido el fin, el único mal lo estaríamos haciendo quedándonos en una relación en la que ya no queremos estar, no sería justo para nosotrxs ni para la pareja.
Una relación es un acuerdo entre 2 personas
Las personas hacemos lo que creemos que es mejor para nosotros y nuestras acciones no necesariamente son lo que las otras personas quisieran. Una relación es un acuerdo entre 2 personas y como tal se puede romper.
Cuando creamos la ilusión de que este acuerdo (relación) es para «siempre» estamos vulnerables a permitir cosas que en otra circunstancia no hubiéramos permitido y podemos llegar a sentir culpa por querer dejar la relación, porque de alguna forma «prometimos», pero la verdad en el amor manda el corazón y a veces sin más deja de querer y no hay más que hacer.
Darle vueltas al asunto sólo nos hace más daño. Hay que entender esta situación como es, el fin de una relación, como muchas otras han terminado. No podemos decir que esta mal, tampoco bien, simplemente es así.
Claro, es muy fácil decirlo, en sí el concepto parece muy sencillo pero cuando nos toca estar dentro y vernos en la necesidad de tomar la decisión y sentir el dolor del adiós es otra cosa completamente. Pero es importante saber que entre todo el caos estamos siendo reales y honestxs.
Amor, costumbre y miedos
El amor en algún punto de la relación sin duda existió y a veces al final, la costumbre de estar con esa persona, las rutinas, el estilo de vida o el miedo de estar solx o miedo a la incertidumbre lo podemos confundir por amor. A veces las dudas de si seguir o terminar no se basan en el amor, sino el miedo a perder o a sentir el dolor de la separación.
Porque siendo honestos no es fácil enfrentar un cambio tan radical en nuestra vida, en el que cambia desde nuestras actividades del día a día, círculo social, hasta nuestros planes a futuro, un día creíamos que teníamos planeada la vida y al otro no tenemos más que incertidumbre y a todo esto hay que sumarle la angustia y el dolor de la ruptura.
Es difícil enfrentar todos estos cambios, la tristeza y pudiéramos pensar que es más conveniente seguir con la relación y evitarnos todo esto, aplicamos el refrán mas vale malo conocido que bueno por conocer.
Pero seguir una relación por costumbre o miedos poco a poco nos va mermando, la vida se vuelve monótona, como si la chispa de la vida se fuera apagando. Si el amor terminó es mas doloroso seguir así que ponerle fin.
Cuando aún tenemos amor por la pareja y las diferencias podrían tener solución, me refiero cuando no hubo violencia o algo que vaya en contra de nuestra salud mental o física podemos plantear la situación y buscar vías como terapia de pareja o establecer compromisos para salvar la relación, podemos agotar estas instancias y la pareja puede salir fortalecida, si ya se intento solucionar y no se logró el cometido o si simplemente ya no quieres continuar es momento de finiquitar y seguir con la vida.
¿Cuándo terminar la relación?
Estamos en una relación por amor, para lograr metas en común, para ser mejores personas, iniciar una familia, etc. Pero a veces llega el momento en el que ya no encontramos razones para seguir, a veces dejamos de querer, sentimos la necesidad de tomar otro camino, la pareja ya no esta comprometida, sufrimos una infidelidad o simplemente la pareja lejos de producirnos un beneficio se ha convertido en una carga y cada día nos pesa más.
No hay momento «correcto» para terminar una relación, no hay fecha o lapso de tiempo en el que sea más fácil, una vez que hemos tomado la decisión lo mejor es sincerarnos y hacerle saber nuestro sentir.
Lo mejor es hacerlo lo más pronto posible, para poder iniciar la etapa del duelo y continuar con la vida, también porque no es justo para la pareja que pasen los días creyendo que quizá las cosas no están bien pero tienen arreglo o inclusive que no tenga idea y piense que todo esta bien mientras nosotrxs ya no tenemos interés en la relación y estamos esperando el momento para terminarla.
¿Cómo terminar la relación?
Las reglas para terminar una relación son el respeto y la sinceridad. Ha llegado el momento de ponerle fecha, lugar y hora para pronunciar la frase «tenemos que hablar».
Una vez llegado el momento la mejor forma de decirlo es siendo firme y directxs, sin rodeos, evita las faltas al respeto pues estamos expresando una decisión respetuosa, no buscamos iniciar una pelea o hacer daño innecesario a la otra persona.
Ten en cuenta que tu llevas tiempo contemplando y analizando tu decisión, tu pareja la esta escuchando por primera vez y aunque lo sospechara o lo estuviera esperando siempre es una sorpresa y nadie esta realmente preparado para ese momento.
No somos responsables de lo que la otra persona exprese pero sí nos compete lo que nosotrxs le respondamos, claro que es difícil mantener la calma en un momento tan emotivo rodeado de tristeza, desconcierto y en ocasiones lágrimas, pero es importante no caer en provocaciones.
No podemos saber como vaya a transcurrir el encuentro y realmente nunca estamos preparados más que con la verdad, una despedida es triste y es un momento que nos vamos a llevar, evitemos a toda costa los insultos, descalificaciones y rabia que puedan hacer de este momento más difícil de superar de lo que ya es.
También es común en este momento que la pareja pida nuestras razones por las cuales estamos terminando, las confronte y busque evitar el fin de la relación. Es importante mantenerse firme y dar las explicaciones que se consideren justas.
No somos de piedra, claro que duele este momento y nos podemos sentir mal pero estamos diciendo la verdad y al final eso duele menos que mantener una mentira, probablemente en ese momento no se perciba así pero con el paso del tiempo se reconocerá.
Entendamos que a partir de este momento de separación ya no nos compete apoyar a la pareja en el momento triste, por más duro que parezca es momento de levantarse de la mesa y decir adiós.
El post-rompimiento
En el noviazgo podemos efectivamente retirarnos e iniciar con la fase del duelo, quizá tengamos algunas posesiones de la ex pareja que queramos enviarle o pase a recoger pero a parte de eso no hay razón para tener más contacto.
Cuando vivimos en el mismo hogar de la ahora ex pareja, después de la ruptura hay temas que tratar, posesiones que repartir, como quien se queda en la casa, quien se va, las cosas que son de ambos a quien se le asignan, etc.
Es una de las razones por las cuales el momento de la separación se lleva mejor con respeto, pues aunque termine la relación aún quedan muchos temas por decidirse y que mejor que hacer las cosas de la manera mas amable y civilizada posible.
También habrá las situaciones donde la pareja lo tome de la peor manera y decida hacer de las negociaciones posteriores un infierno a lo que nos veríamos en la necesidad de decidir si las posesiones materiales valen la pena o si es preferible alejarse y empezar de nuevo.
En el caso de que haya hijos se romperá la pareja pero el vínculo tendrá que permanecer por el bien de los mismos. Este es otro tema que merece atención especial en otra entrada del blog.
¿Qué sigue?
Después de terminar una relación lo menos que tenemos en mente es ponernos a realizar proyectos como si nada hubiera pasado. Y es normal, estamos en una etapa de duelo y tenemos que dar algo de tiempo antes de sentirnos listxs para empezar nuevas actividades.
El bajón después de la ruptura es una etapa clave, es un momento donde nos volvemos a construir.
Si sientes que tocaste fondo, entonces sólo hay una dirección en la cual ir, hacia arriba, esta etapa de bajón emocional nos da la oportunidad de conectarnos con nuestro interior, son momentos donde pasamos tiempo a solas, pensando y reflexionando.
En esos momentos vas a descubrir que eres más fuerte de lo que pensabas y te vas a dar cuenta que hay una voz en tu interior que si la escuchas, te va a guiar por este camino.
Una nueva oportunidad
En el proceso de sanar podemos encontrar que es una nueva oportunidad que nos da la vida para evolucionar, conocerte y poder estar en paz.
Y cuando te conoces y estas en paz, no tienes necesidad de estar en una relación tóxica (amorosa, familiar o de trabajo), no precisas de una persona para poder estar bien, eres consciente de tus decisiones, la vida tiene sentido y aprendes a ser feliz.
Date la oportunidad de atreverte a hacer cosas que quieres hacer perote da temor hacerlas, acércate a tu familia y/o amigos, permite sentirte vulnerable.
Probablemente todavía no estas donde quisieras estar pero eso no es pretexto para no disfrutar los días.
El proceso de sanar hay que recorrerlo todos los días, de eso se trata la vida, de ser tu mejor versión.
Hoy tienes la oportunidad de aprovecharla, estas a una decisión de distancia.
Jesse B
Cosasdespuesdelamor
Como y cuando terminar una relación
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Mi nombre es Liliana Jose, quiero compartir con todos este gran testimonio de mi vida. Estaba casada con mi esposo Michael Jose, lo amo mucho. Llevamos 8 años de casados y tenemos dos hijos. Se fue de vacaciones a Chipre donde conoció a una señora llamada Linda, me dijo que ya no está interesado en nuestro matrimonio. Me confundí tanto y comencé a buscar ayuda, todos los esfuerzos para traerlo de vuelta fracasaron hasta que conocí a una vieja amiga llamada Christina y le conté mi problema. Luego me presentó a un hombre llamado Dr. Trust, quien le lanzó un hechizo que le devolvió a su ex en 14 horas. Me puse en contacto con el Dr. Trust para que me ayudara a recuperar a mi esposo y me pidió que no me preocupara de que los dioses de sus antepasados pelearan por mí. Me dijo que en 14 horas nos reunirá a mí y a mi esposo. Después de 14 horas, mi esposo me llamó y me dijo que regresaría a casa conmigo y con los niños. Me sorprendí cuando lo vi y comenzó a suplicar perdón… ahora somos una familia feliz. Todo gracias al gran Dr. Trust. si necesitas su ayuda puedes contactarlo a través de:
Correo electrónico:: drtrustspelltemple@gmail.com
Whats-App: +14242983869
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NECESITO URGENTEMENTE UN LANZADOR DE HECHIZOS DE AMOR FUERTE, PODEROSO Y EFECTIVO QUE ME AYUDEN A TRAER DE VUELTA A MI EX AMANTE URGENTEMENTE 2023
Correo electrónico: Drgbogbospellcaster@gmail.com
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Este es un día muy feliz en mi vida gracias a la ayuda que me ha brindado el Dr. Gbogbo al ayudarme a recuperar a mi exmarido con su magia y hechizo de amor. Estuve casada durante 6 años y fue terrible porque mi esposo realmente me estaba engañando porque tenía fibromas y no podía concebir para mi esposo debido a mis fibromas y mi esposo estaba buscando el divorcio, pero cuando me encontré con el Dr. Gbogbo correo electrónico en Internet sobre cómo ayudó a tantas personas a recuperar a su ex y ayudar a arreglar las relaciones y hacer felices a las personas en su relación. El Dr. Gbogbo también ha restaurado la salud de muchas personas, que incluyen herpes, fibromas, síndrome de ovario poliquístico, diabetes y muchos más. Le expliqué mi situación y luego busqué su ayuda, pero para mi mayor sorpresa, me dijo que me ayudaría con mi caso y luego me daría una medicina herbaria que me ayudaría a reducir mis fibromas de forma natural sin tener que operarme, lo cual realmente hizo. dándome la medicina a base de hierbas que redujo mis fibromas de forma natural sin necesidad de operarme. Aquí estoy ahora celebrando porque mi Esposo ha cambiado totalmente para bien y actualmente estoy embarazada de él. Él siempre quiere estar a mi lado y no puede hacer nada sin mi presencia. Estoy disfrutando mucho de mi matrimonio, que gran celebración. Seguiré testificando en Internet porque el Dr. Gbogbo es realmente un verdadero lanzador de hechizos. ¿Realmente necesitas ayuda? luego comuníquese con el Dr. Gbogbo ahora por correo electrónico: Drgbogbospellcaster@gmail.com
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NECESITO URGENTEMENTE UN LANZADOR DE HECHIZOS DE AMOR FUERTE, PODEROSO Y EFECTIVO QUE ME AYUDEN A TRAER DE VUELTA A MI EX AMANTE URGENTEMENTE 2023
Correo electrónico: Drgbogbospellcaster@gmail.com
Whatsapp: +234 703 166 3661
Este es un día muy feliz en mi vida gracias a la ayuda que me ha brindado el Dr. Gbogbo al ayudarme a recuperar a mi exmarido con su magia y hechizo de amor. Estuve casada durante 6 años y fue terrible porque mi esposo realmente me estaba engañando porque tenía fibromas y no podía concebir para mi esposo debido a mis fibromas y mi esposo estaba buscando el divorcio, pero cuando me encontré con el Dr. Gbogbo correo electrónico en Internet sobre cómo ayudó a tantas personas a recuperar a su ex y ayudar a arreglar las relaciones y hacer felices a las personas en su relación. El Dr. Gbogbo también ha restaurado la salud de muchas personas, que incluyen herpes, fibromas, síndrome de ovario poliquístico, diabetes y muchos más. Le expliqué mi situación y luego busqué su ayuda, pero para mi mayor sorpresa, me dijo que me ayudaría con mi caso y luego me daría una medicina herbaria que me ayudaría a reducir mis fibromas de forma natural sin tener que operarme, lo cual realmente hizo. dándome la medicina a base de hierbas que redujo mis fibromas de forma natural sin necesidad de operarme. Aquí estoy ahora celebrando porque mi Esposo ha cambiado totalmente para bien y actualmente estoy embarazada de él. Él siempre quiere estar a mi lado y no puede hacer nada sin mi presencia. Estoy disfrutando mucho de mi matrimonio, que gran celebración. Seguiré testificando en Internet porque el Dr. Gbogbo es realmente un verdadero lanzador de hechizos. ¿Realmente necesitas ayuda? luego comuníquese con el Dr. Gbogbo ahora por correo electrónico: Drgbogbospellcaster@gmail.com
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